I am the type of girl that some may deem to be a bit “extra” in many aspects. Oftentimes, I like to overdress for every occasion, and I’m putting extra attention into the smallest details of my outfit. Come to think of it, I’m putting extra attention into the details of almost everything. I’m that girl who likes to slow down and romanticize the smallest moments of my life. No longer do I subdue who I am or mask who I am to be accepted by the masses. I was never meant to fit in. Nor was I ever meant to be ordinary. So I’ve decided to shamelessly embrace being “extra”.
Honestly, we should all embrace being extra and unapologetically be our most authentic selves. After all, no matter what we do, we’re going to be judged by someone. No matter how hard we try to subdue our true selves to make others more comfortable, somebody is going to think we’re too much. Honestly, there is no way that we can make everyone happy. And we all know that it’s impossible to be liked by everybody. So you know what, my lovely? You might as well live your life in a way that makes you happy. And it’s better to be disliked for being your authentic self than it is to be liked for a subdued facade.
That said, there are so many wonderful things that happen when you allow yourself to embrace being extra. Honestly, the benefits of being your most authentic self far outweigh the judgment that you may get from others. Especially when you weigh in the fact that, maybe, those judging you might just be envying your confidence to be your most authentic self.
Embracing Your Most Authentic Self
I’m going to be honest with you for a second, in the past, I’ve tried hard to subdue my true self and become someone I wasn’t to attempt to fit in. Admittedly, I was also never particularly good at concealing my true self. Bits my my authentic self would always slip through the mask of who I was pretending to be. And honestly, it only made it obvious that I was desperately craving acceptance from others. Certainly, wanting to be accepted by others and feel loved is human nature. But trying to keep a facade for the acceptance of others is quite draining. Especially when you’re subduing or hiding some of the biggest parts of yourself.
On that note, if I’m honest, I often find that I quickly want to leave social situations where I can’t be my authentic self. Sometimes, I’m simply just not interested in the conversation, and I’ll know I have nothing to contribute. Othertimes, I’ll feel a bit of sadness for the parts of myself that I have to bury to keep the peace. Which is certainly not something you want to feel amongst friends. Or with a romantic partner. Because why should any of us have to give up parts of ourselves or change who we are, just because of what anyone else thinks we should be?
Let’s embrace our most authentic selves and allow our true selves to shine. Overdress for the grocery store if it fills you with confidence and showcases your unique style. Romanticize your morning cup of coffee or tea, when most people would be trying to rush out the door. Be passionate about your special interests, and make them a big part of your life. Don’t be afraid to stand out. Embrace what makes you extra.
Feeling Confident and Empowered in Who YOU Are
When I made the decision to fully and unapologetically embrace being the girl who is a bit “extra”, I quickly began to feel more confident in myself. Certainly, the affirmations that I often say to build myself up have helped to manifest my confidence in my authentic self. Along with knowing that I have boldly chosen to embrace all parts of myself and express myself in ways that many are afraid to. And honestly, it is quite empowering to be the woman who stands out from the crowd. Especially when you’re allowing yourself to exude the very energy that you’re looking to attract into your life.
And given the fact that the wealthy energy that I’m manifesting into my life is quite extra, it’s something I can’t be afraid to embrace. I’ve built my personal style to be quite polished, with a touch of coquette, and I’m not afraid to be considered overdressed. Even at the office, I’ll arrive in a little black dress with a pearl necklace, with a matcha in hand. I boldly speak of my entrepreneurial ventures and use my creativity every chance that I get. It’s also no secret that I’m a cozy gamer, that I love bold makeup, or that I’m quite an emotional girly.
And you know what? It feels great not feeling as though I have anything to hide, or that I need to keep subdued. I don’t feel like I’m walking on eggshells to please others. Which is a wonderful feeling as a recovering people pleaser.
Standing Out and Being Memorable
When you embrace being extra and allow yourself to be authentically you, you naturally stand out from the crowd. And you stand out in all the best ways. Others will notice the confidence that you exude in simply being yourself and not holding back. Your boldness will leave a memorable impression on those that you come across. Your vibrant energy will become a strong part of your personal brand. And regardless of whether you’re an entrepreneur or you’re a corporate baddie, your unique and passionate perspective will leave a memorable impression on potential viewers, clients, and employers.
We all have something unique to contribute to this world. Let’s not subdue what makes us unique. Let’s not allow ourselves to blend into the crowd when we have something unique to offer to this world. Be so good that they can’t ignore you, my lovely. Be bold on social media so that others flock to your page to follow you and engage with your content. Let your unique style, perspective, and energy be a part of your sales pitch. Showcase your hobbies and unique skillsets. You never know what opportunities may come your way.
Even in your personal life, you never know just who you might meet when you boldly and confidently embrace being extra. You just might catch the attention of an amazing circle of friends, who share your interest in living an authentic and extraordinary life.
Breaking Free of Societal Norms and Expectations
I’m not going to lie, societal norms and expectations have never been my thing. As a neurodivergent girly, I was never given the manual on how to conform to societal norms. And honestly, I don’t want to read that rule book. I’d likely be burning it after reading the first paragraph. Quite honestly, the idea of living up to societal expectations makes me cringe. The idea of fitting into societal norms makes me feel a though I’m sacrificing bits of myself to please others. I don’t want to tone it down and dull my own sparkle. To hell with meeting anyone else’s expectations. I’m here to blaze my own path and live my best life.
And so are you, my lovely, even if our paths look very different. Follow your own path, and don’t let society pressure you into following any norm that doesn’t resonate with you. Burn the rule book that was written by others’ expectations. Don’t subdue the most vibrant parts of yourself. Embrace being extra, even when it feels scary. This is your life, so allow yourself to live it on your terms. And you never know, you just might start a movement for the women and young girls around you to do the same.
Inspiring Others and Making A True Impact
Watching other women build their dream life and become their authentic selves is absolutely wonderful. It’s uplifting and inspiring to hear the stories of women who’ve decided to live their lives on their terms and love themselves unconditionally. What is even more inspiring is that they don’t subdue themselves, and they aren’t afraid to showcase the most wonderfully extravagant parts of themselves. They don’t downplay their accomplishments, subdue their vibrant personality, or diminish any part of themselves. And if they come across as extra? They embrace what makes them extra.
It is these women who have inspired me to embrace my most authentic self and create my best life. These women played a role in pushing me to spread my own unique perspective. Because why the heck wouldn’t I also want to uplift another queen to become her best self? Inspiring another lovely human being to love themself and manifest the life that they desire is such an honor as a content creator.
Heck, you don’t even have to be a content creator, author, or entrepreneur to inspire the people around you. You might inspire your best friend, your sister, your daughter, your coworker, or even a random stranger to find the confidence the be her authentic self. Your confidence and radiance may even help someone else pull themself out of a rut. And they just might continue the cycle and spread their light to others.
Finding Your True Tribe
I’m not going to lie, when you embrace being extra, some people are certainly going to give you the side-eye. Some will say that you’re “too much”, and they’ll be quick to point their finger at you in judgment. And you know what? It’s best to just let them judge you. Allow them to filter themselves out of your life, as they aren’t your true people anyway. And while it can certainly be hard to let people make their own assumptions about you, it is better to be disliked for who you are than loved for something you’re not. This includes by family members, people you may have viewed as friends, and (especially) your partner.
Honestly, it is better to be a lone wolf than it is to be surrounded by people who won’t accept you as your genuine self. Especially when it comes to your closest relationships.
That said, when you embrace being extra and allow your confidence to radiate from within, the right people will take notice. Like-minded people will want to be around you and build a genuine connection with you. You will make friends who share similar passions, hobbies, and radiate similar energies. You’ll make connections with lovely souls that you can bond with on a deeper level. Perhaps, you just might launch a brand together. Or maybe, you’ll have someone to chat about your aspirations with at the cute little teahouse on the square after your group pilates class.
Whatever the case, no one in your circle will need to hold themselves back. And the connection won’t feel conditional or forced.
Conclusion
Let yourself shine, my lovely, and if someone says you’re extra, embrace it. Be the woman who overdresses for the occasion and has a unique style that stands out. Be passionate about what sets your soul on fire, and be the girl who goes for her dreams. Don’t be afraid to stand out from the crowd and build a memorable personal brand. Give yourself permission to love yourself unconditionally and unapologetically be your authentic self. Don’t dull your sparkle for the comfort of others. Not everyone will understand you, but that’s okay. Your true tribe will love your authenticity.
What is your favorite part of yourself that may be considered a bit “extra”? How do you fully embrace your authentic self? What is something unique about you that you’re confident in? I’d love to hear about your self-love journey and how you embrace being extra!
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